Whether it's personal or in business, we all go through break ups. While some parts of the break up process may feel grueling, it doesn't have to be that way!
In this post, I'm going to take you through my 5 steps for recovering from any business (or personal) break up.
This process is NOT for you if you are trying to get something from the other person. But it definitely IS for you if you are looking to move forward in a powerful way and learn from what you just went through.
Keep reading, or watch this video to see how you can make the quickly pass through your break up experience with these 5 steps for recovery.
1. Congratulate Yourself on the Risk You Took
Give yourself the praise and congratulations you deserve for taking a leap of faith into the unknown. Many people are not willing to trust themselves enough to take a risk and YOU DID.
Even if the end result didn’t turn out how you thought it would, you still did a bold and courageous thing in the first place by going out on a limb and taking a chance. Great work!
2. Find 3-5 Things You’re Grateful for About the Experience
While you’re moving through your business break up recovery, do the work to list out 3-5 things that you’re grateful for about your experience. Not everything that happened during this relationship agreement was bad.
- What did you enjoy about your experience?
- How did you benefit from your time inside this agreement?
- What are you just plain grateful for?
- Did the relationship help you grow?
- Did it give you the opportunity to travel?
- Did you learn new things?
Get out your pen and paper and make your list! You might be surprised at what you discover.
3. Do an Audit of the Partnership or Business Relationship
While you have your paper out writing down your gratitudes and appreciations, turn to a new page and do an audit of the partnership.
This isn’t something that has to be done in one sitting. You can begin writing down what is top of mind and come back to these pages throughout the coming weeks as you move through the break up recovery process.
During your audit, you want to consider where you can take responsibility for how the relationship worked out.
Knowing what you know now, what could you have done differently to create a different or better outcome?
While doing the audit, be sure to keep steps 4 and 5 top of mind. They are an important part of this break up recovery process.
4. Don’t Get Stuck in the “Woulda, Coulda, Shoulda“
During your relationship audit you might find yourself sliding into “woulda, coulda, shoulda” land. Stop yourself right there.
This process of recovery does not involve a time machine. You cannot go back to any moment in the past and change what has happened.
But you can be here now with the awareness of what you would have done differently and use that information as you move forward in your next project.
You might consider setting a time limit for yourself to grieve. When that time period comes to an end, no matter what, it's time to let it go. In the past, I've given myself as much as 24 hours to feel sad about losing a client. One nights sleep is plenty! Wake up the next morning and go after it.
5. Don’t Play the Blame Game
While it can be easy to point fingers and blame someone else for how your relationship turned out, the truth is that your choices make a difference in the outcome no matter whose “fault” it is.
None of the tips in this process of recovery will be useful to you if you’re only interested in blaming the other person.
This is about you taking responsibility for your own choices, words and actions.
Now this last step I’m going to share with you is a bonus step and is completely optional in the break up recovery process. Though, many find it to be incredibly helpful!
6. Writing for Completion
This last and final step is about bringing things to completion and getting closure for yourself.
Like I said before, this is an optional bonus step for your break up recovery process.
As you are moving through these steps, if you begin to realize you have something to communicate to the other person, this is the part of the process where you should reach out to them.
But only if it feels right for you.
You could write them a letter, email, or ask for a phone call.
In your email you can reference some of the gratitudes you listed out for yourself. You could share what you would have done differently, or take responsibility for your role in how the relationship played out.
This is not about getting them to take responsibility. It is not even about them responding at all.
The intention of step 6, writing for completion, is about you and your recovery.
That being said, you can write this person a letter and say what’s on your heart without ever actually giving it to them.
You can keep it in your journal, burn the page after it’s written, bury it, share it with a friend, read it out loud, or something else like that.
There you have it folks! I hope that these 6 Tips for Recovering from Any Break Up help you along your journey.
I’d love to hear from you in the comments: Are you going through a break up? Are you currently in the recovery process? Which one of these steps resonated with you the most?
And if you've just lost a client, and looking for a new one… check out our newest guide:
7 Under the Radar Ways to Get Clients Fast. Get the complete guide right here.